It's been a long-honored tradition, a rule even, in American politics that you stop campaigning during the other party's convention. This year, the Republicans honored that rule. So who do you think finally shattered this time-honored tradition? Must I even tell you?

Kerry did not wait for Bush to formally accept the Republican nomination at the New York convention before launching one of his most outspoken attacks on his rival for the White House.

What a gracious gentleman he is.

Yet according to the Washington Post, it's no more Mr. Nice Guy from Kerry. Last year, many Democrats predicted a political season filled with vicious attacks ads, personal animus, and slander, and now they'll do their dogged best to self-fulfill this prophecy. Even more..

Despite being compared to Hitler by MoveOn.org, being falsely accused of creating and controlling the 250+ Swifboat Vets, accused by Kerry of going AWOL, accused by Al Gore of deliberately deceiving and being a traitor to our country, Bush and Republicans have so far focused mostly on Kerry's inconsistent record.

But now that ONE 527 group has taken a few shots at Kerry, and Zell Miller has said he's weak on defense, it's time for Kerry to get dirty. Or dirtier, perhaps.

What will it be this time? Let's look and see, kids!

Trick #1: Lie about the Republican Convention...

John F. Kerry came out swinging Thursday night, denouncing the Republican convention for its "anger and distortion"...

Anger? The parts I saw didn't look angry to me. Perhaps they cut to commercials during the angry bits...

Trick #2: Project! Claim your opponents have portrayed you as unpatriotic while actually hurling around the exact charge you impute to them!

...and belittling Vice President Cheney for avoiding the military draft during the Vietnam War era.

I'm sure all of Kerry's Vietnam-era lefty supporters will be totally outraged he's impugned them in this way. :-)

Trick #3: Pretend you already have achieved dictatorial power! As a first reflex, promise to silence any dissenting opinion! (That gets the old despotism-exercising muscles limber for the real thing...)

In his sharpest and most personal remarks of the presidential campaign, Kerry responded to the rhetorical assault on him at the convention by accusing the Republicans of attacking "my fitness to serve as commander in chief. Well, here's my answer: I'm not going to have my commitment to defend this country questioned...

Actually, you will, so get used to it...

... by those who refused to serve when they could have and by those who have misled the nation into Iraq."

... and by lots of people like me, too, who actually know a bit about your voting record, and know how it reflects on your committment to defending us.

So, Kerry: Bush "misled" us into Iraq? Funny, since you said you were "further ahead" on going into Iraq than any of your peers. And -- oh, by the way -- you said it during the Clinton administration.

Darn those Bush time-bending mind-control powers!

Trick #4: Put untrue words into your opponent's mouths...

Noting that Cheney had described him as "unfit for office,"

A transcript of Cheney's speech is here; search it for the word "unfit". Guess what? It's not there! Check it for yourself: Cheney never said such a thing. Kerry is lying to you. Again.

Trick #6: Accuse your opponent of doing exactly what you did! Hope people don't notice!

"Let me tell you what I think makes someone unfit for duty," Kerry says in the remarks. "Misleading our nation into war in Iraq makes you unfit to lead this nation.

Really? Let's remember again: (1) Kerry supported war when Clinton was president; (2) Kerry came out for the war before the Democratic primaries, and (3) Afterwards, Kerry still said the president had done the right thing.

So, if being and speaking in favor of the war was "misleading", then you did quite a bit of it yourself, didn't you Senator Kerry?

Guiliani was right when he said Kerry will have time before the election to change his position on Iraq four or five more times. Now he's against it again! What do you think the odds are he'll flip again? (Or would that be a flop?)

Trick #6: Get really, really personal! Attack a man for having a child!

"I guess I'll leave it up to the voters whether five deferments makes someone more qualified to defend this nation than two tours of duty," Kerry said. Cheney received a series of deferments from 1962 to 1966 for college and graduate school and then for having a child.

So Kerry thinks Clinton isn't fit to hold office? That's interesting news! Has Kerry suddenly become a Republican???

Trick #7: Accuse the incumbent of being guilty of things you can't and won't improve either, and will probably make worse!

"... Doing nothing while this nation loses millions of jobs makes you unfit to lead this nation. Letting 45 million Americans go without health care makes you unfit to lead this nation. Letting the Saudi royal family control our energy costs makes you unfit to lead this nation..."

Go Kerry! Go! Spit that vitri-ol!

Trick #8: Say things which are so untrue, even the Post has to correct you...

"... Handing out billions [in] government contracts to Halliburton while you're still on their payroll makes you unfit."

Cheney, who was not personally involved in the contracts, gave up the chief executive's post at Halliburton when he ran for vice president but has continued to receive deferred compensation.

Trick #9: Pretend you don't receive tons of special interest money!

The ad concludes with a classic Democratic message that had also been used by Bill Clinton and Al Gore: "The fundamental choice in this election is between a president who will fight for the middle class and a president who sides with the special interests in this country."

Yeah, that trick worked real well during the primaries. That'll give the Republicans a nice chance to point out the special interest groups who really fund the Kerry campaign.

Oh wait, they're doing it already:

Bush campaign spokesman Steve Schmidt turned the "special interests" charge back at Kerry, saying the senator has helped block medical malpractice reform. "He's picked the side of the trial lawyers over doctors and patients," Schmidt said.

Trick #10: Make still more promises you have no ability to keep:

"It's time to stop rewarding companies for shipping jobs overseas. To get health care costs under control. And to end America's dependence on Middle East oil."

So Kerry plans to make American companies less competitive? Oh, that'll help us all reeeal well.

And what's Kerry going to do to "end American's dependence on Middle East oil"? Drill ANWAR? Gas rationing? Stop buying oil from Quatar, Kuwait, Saudi Arabia, and any other middle eastern nation? Yeah, right!

And what will Kerry do to bring health care costs under control? Socialize medicine? Oh, yeah, that works real well. Ask the Swedish:

The Social Democratic Minister of Health, Lars Engqvist, is now explicitly welcoming more private – even for-profit – players into Swedish healthcare. Fresh proposals from a government committee open the door to for-profit companies. They will be allowed to operate any kind of publicly owned hospital except for the largest ones, like university hospitals. They can even own them.

Ban lawsuits? Hah, with trial lawyer Edwards as Veep? Puhlease.

He's ly-ing.

Well, watch the Bush folk go negative now:

The president's campaign, meanwhile, released three positive ads Thursday night, highlighting domestic initiatives from Bush's convention speech...

Kerry can't take being questioned. It drives him nuts. He especially hates when the charges are actually factually true. He just hates that.

Compared to Bush and Cheney, who regularly endure, kindly, being called the worst names I've ever heard, Kerry is a fragile, fragile person; I'm dearly hoping we won't all live under his thumb.

It's usually the fragile guys who make the scariest rulers.