I've been following this odd little saga for a while. It hasn't resolved yet, but it's gotten funny enough to publish (he wrote, aware of the normal unfunny drivel he typically publishes here)...

In the opening gambit, EU entry shuts down a traditional Czech cheesemaker:

Petr Hajek, 40, from Pohorska Ves in the southern Czech Republic, earns just 4,500 Czech crowns (£97) a week from his business, making cheese in his kitchen and leaving it to ripen in the cellar.

The cost of buying equipment to meet the new hygiene regulations imposed since the country joined the EU in May, however, would be almost three million crowns (£64,000) - way beyond his means.

"I told the food hygiene inspectors that it was not worth all that investment as I only make three to four kilos of cheese a day," said Mr Hajek, who has 30 goats.

When he asked them what to do with it, they told them to feed it to the chickens. He thought that was a swell idea, and decided to market it as animal feed, labelling it "Goat's Cheese" and putting up the following sign:

Goat's cheese made from non-pasteurised milk. Hand kneaded. Recipe kept for six generations. Absolutely failing to meet EU norms, therefore designated for animal feeding purposes. Tested on people.

What are the world's most pressing problems, according to the EU? Apparently, a Polish farmer selling cheese as an animal feed rank right up there near the top, by the looks of the attention they've given this little 'crisis':

Armies of health inspectors have taken to standing outside the farm, interviewing customers about what they plan to do with the cheese.

Perhaps the crisis in Darfur would be better attended if it involved violations of health codes? No reason "armies of health inspectors" couldn't be deployed to make sure the Janjaweed mauraders were eating right, no?

Oh, and I do love this:

One customer, a pensioner living in a one-bedroom flat whose only pet was a goldfish, denied eating it himself, saying it was for a neighbour's dog.

Mr Hajek said: "I know they have been asking my customers about the cheese. I don't know how many, but they couldn't find a single person who would admit to eating it. They all said it was for their animals."

Unable to close the legal loophole, Czech officials now claim that it is unfit for animal consumption because it is mixed with herbs and spices.

Yes of course. Can't have our animals exposed to "herbs and spices" now, can we? Poor guy. Six generations of cheese. Phhhbt.

Discussion question: Is this actually about health, or is it about the fear that somewhere, someone might be doing something without your permission? In other words, is this a matter of safety or a need for control?

Hah. As if you didn't know.

Thanks to "The Road to EU Serfdom".