I am eating a small pizza. The box assures me the pizza constitutes three servings. I find this improbable: Who cuts their pizza in thirds?

Perhaps I am supposed to have cut it into sixths, and eaten two slices. Again, that seems improbable -- the pizza is only a few inches across.

The box tells me each serving has 410 calories, of which an incredible 190 originate from fat. As I will be eating the whole pizza (baring some unforeseen tragedy before I finish, such as coronary brought on by the third slice) this means I will consume a stunning 1230 calories. For lunch.

You might assume I was overweight. I am not. The pizza box assures me people need something like 2000 calories per day -- probably less in my case. So I'm getting nearly a days' worth of food in one sitting. And probably a week's worth of fat.

I wonder what I should have for dessert.